Mistakes happen

Sometimes I need reminders to help me realize that I am not infallible. Mistakes are bound to happen. But some mistakes come along and take us by surprise. Guilt and shame remind us that we are only human. We use these kinds of mistakes to teach us humility and forgiveness, for others and ourselves. Mistakes are one of life's hard lessons.
This morning I found out, through tears streaming down my youngest daughter's cheeks, that I made a mistake. A huge mistake. Late last year, Scott and I took the kids to Build A Bear. In each kid's bear, we put a small voice box with a special recording for each child. Daddy's voice. A gift for each kid to cherish and hold on to for as long as the device would live.
Well, this last weekend, I mistakenly washed Melayna's bear with her laundry. The voice box, located in her bear's hand, pathetically hissed static when the button was pressed. The sound of Daddy's voice was irrevocably replaced with unintelligible crackles. Melayna was hurt and I was devastated.
This was something I could not restore. It was irreplaceable. And I was responsible for this. I knew that I could not bring his original message back to life. But I could, however, try to rectify this situation. I needed to own up to the mistake I made. So I began to cry with my daughter, also crying, in my arms, and apologize for my terrible mistake.
As Melayna got ready for school, I came up with a plan. I have some video recordings Scott left on his phone for the kids. One was for Melayna. I took audio and put together a few phrases closely matching the original recording.'hi Melayna', 'hi baby girl', and 'I love you' - all in Scott's voice.
In tears, at the mall, I explained my situation to the employee at the store. Her first customer of the day was one hot mess. She quickly went to work removing the bear's innards and she empathetically listened to me talk about Scott and offered comfort when needed. I made the new recording on a new voice box. It is choppy. It definitely is not the original. But considering this was all I had, it would have to do. After the voice box was put into place and it was filled with new stuffing, I placed two hearts inside: one from Scott and one from me. I adorned her bear with a new outfit, hugged the associate, and went on my way.
This mistake really brought about so many different emotions within me. Most of my morning, I could hardly contain my emotion. I felt so awful. I know that Melayna would have likely moved on easily from this, but the guilt I felt, and still feel, would not go so easily. My baby girl was happy to have her 'fixed up' bear. She listened to Daddy's voice at least a dozen times tonight and she is now sleeping soundly with her bear lying in her arms. I know that I won't be able to ever bring back the original recording, but I'm happy that I could still give her the sound of his voice. This is one mistake I don't ever hope to make again.