Mistakes happen

Sometimes I need reminders to help me realize that I am not infallible. Mistakes are bound to happen. But some mistakes come along and take us by surprise. Guilt and shame remind us that we are only human. We use these kinds of mistakes to teach us humility and forgiveness, for others and ourselves. Mistakes are one of life's hard lessons.
This morning I found out, through tears streaming down my youngest daughter's cheeks, that I made a mistake. A huge mistake. Late last year, Scott and I took the kids to Build A Bear. In each kid's bear, we put a small voice box with a special recording for each child. Daddy's voice. A gift for each kid to cherish and hold on to for as long as the device would live.
Well, this last weekend, I mistakenly washed Melayna's bear with her laundry. The voice box, located in her bear's hand, pathetically hissed static when the button was pressed. The sound of Daddy's voice was irrevocably replaced with unintelligible crackles. Melayna was hurt and I was devastated.
This was something I could not restore. It was irreplaceable. And I was responsible for this. I knew that I could not bring his original message back to life. But I could, however, try to rectify this situation. I needed to own up to the mistake I made. So I began to cry with my daughter, also crying, in my arms, and apologize for my terrible mistake.
As Melayna got ready for school, I came up with a plan. I have some video recordings Scott left on his phone for the kids. One was for Melayna. I took audio and put together a few phrases closely matching the original recording.'hi Melayna', 'hi baby girl', and 'I love you' - all in Scott's voice.
In tears, at the mall, I explained my situation to the employee at the store. Her first customer of the day was one hot mess. She quickly went to work removing the bear's innards and she empathetically listened to me talk about Scott and offered comfort when needed. I made the new recording on a new voice box. It is choppy. It definitely is not the original. But considering this was all I had, it would have to do. After the voice box was put into place and it was filled with new stuffing, I placed two hearts inside: one from Scott and one from me. I adorned her bear with a new outfit, hugged the associate, and went on my way.
This mistake really brought about so many different emotions within me. Most of my morning, I could hardly contain my emotion. I felt so awful. I know that Melayna would have likely moved on easily from this, but the guilt I felt, and still feel, would not go so easily. My baby girl was happy to have her 'fixed up' bear. She listened to Daddy's voice at least a dozen times tonight and she is now sleeping soundly with her bear lying in her arms. I know that I won't be able to ever bring back the original recording, but I'm happy that I could still give her the sound of his voice. This is one mistake I don't ever hope to make again.

Two runs, one day

Last weekend, I did something absolutely insane and did two races in one day. No really, I did. I started my morning by doing a 5k with inflatable obstacles. I set off with two of my friends and one of my friend's sisters. It was in a huge field near our local airport. The organization benefiting from proceeds collected from the race is the National Mill Dog Rescue. So, I got to hold this little cutie - a spokes-dog for the organization. As you can see, I was quite content holding him. :)

My friend and her sister pushed themselves and ran ahead, while my friend Melanie stuck with my slow butt and pushed me along the way. She didn't let me stop (other than the water station). She pushed me to run for short distances and then keep a brisk walking pace. The group was uneven and we got eaten up by bugs, but I got it done in 51 minutes. 

After the 5k, the kids and I headed for the Big Dog Brag where I signed us up for the family 2k. The Big Dog Brag is a mud run that took place at a local off road park. They have a family 2k, with kid friendly obstacles and a 5k for adults (13+) only. Despite being tired, I had a lot of fun watching the kids get muddy, push themselves to do all the obstacles (Melayna skipped one, but otherwise, she did great), and endure the nearly 1.5 mile trek. Tristan, I believe, made me the most proud. He's normally very frightened of heights. He got through each obstacle not once complaining about the height (some were pretty high climbs). On one obstacle, a tight rope walk of sorts, I could see the look of determination on his face to get through it. I could tell he was scared to fall, but he pushed through his fear and got all the way across. This was officially, Melayna's first mud run. She did really well despite getting scared with a few obstacles. She also wanted to sit on my lap for both mud slides, which I happily obliged. And both times, because I couldn't control myself going down, we turned 180 degrees and went into the muddy pool of water backwards! So much fun!

 I have so much more I want to do when it comes to my fitness goals. Exercise is my drug. It keeps me going. I feel so motivated and excited when I see results. I feel stronger and fitter than I have been in a long time. It is so easy to feel bad for myself, to feel so defeated after all I've been through. Some days I want to crawl under my covers and not come out at all. And these days come and go. But with exercise, those days don't come all too often. With my goals in mind, I want to get up and do something.

The next big adventure is the B Strong Ride in Boulder, Colorado. Twenty-four miles with 1,000 feet in elevation gain. This is going to be tough. I really need to get on my bike more. I may try to do a 5k in July, too. Just a small, short-term goal to keep me motivated. In September, I may sign up for a 10k. Beyond that...I'm not quite sure. I definitely want to do the Spartan Race and finish it. Thinking of signing up for the one in Phoenix in February. I'm hoping to make a long weekend trip out of the whole deal. Maybe see the Grand Canyon while I'm out there.

I have weight loss goals, which is slow going, but I really don't mind so much. I have to keep telling myself, that the scale isn't what matters. What matters is that I'm doing it. I'm staying active. I'm eating better than before. And that I feel better. The weight loss will come in time. This isn't going to happen overnight. For now, my plan is to continue what I'm doing and add more to it. I want to do some strength training by lifting weights. I need a lifting partner, though. Someone who has an idea of what he or she is doing. Maybe I should pay for some personal training sessions, too? A thought to revisit later.

What a busy summer....and now its over?

Oh my gosh!  What a busy, busy summer it has been.  After Jacey's birthday, I've been busy volunteering at events, trying to do homework, doing things with the family, working like crazy, and now running our Toastmasters club (I was elected president earlier this summer).  I was asked to help photograph a wedding (and I am still not done editing the pictures).  And, of course, we've been prepping for school, which began this week.

So, let's do a quick photo recap of our summer and I'll post on about something I am very excited to share!

Tristan lost his first tooth!

The girls get to throw a "first pitch" at a Sky Sox baseball game!

Scott takes the girls out for some target practice.

We went to Renaissance Festival!  (Yes, we dress up in garb.  And yes, that is a man being apprehended in the background).

 

I got a haircut!

That is a quick recap, in pictures, of a few things we've done this summer.  Now on to school...in the next post!

A new toy

I know it has been a while.  I guess I have some updating to do.  Oh well.  Such is life. 
We move forward and get on with our lives.

Anyway, one of the things I love to do is photography.  For the last two or three years, I've immersed myself in the world of DSLR's.  Before this time, I loved taking photos of my children, but envied the pictures that others would taking using their fancy, expensive cameras.  I wanted to do something like that.  I wanted to learn more about how to take good photographs. 

About three years ago, I spent part of our tax refund on a Craigslist purchase.  It was a older Canon Rebel model.  It was only 5 or 6 megapixels, but it came with two back-up batteries, a telephoto lens, and a few memory cards, which was good since it used flash and not SD. 

I poured over blogs and photography websites.  I learned what I could while enjoying the new range of photos I was able to take. 

Today, I have a Canon Rebel T3i.  I stuck to what I was already familiar with and what was capable of using my existing lens.  It still hurt in my pocket, but not too bad.  We purchased it after my son had a bit of an accident with my starter DSLR.  I don't think I'm too heartbroken to have gotten a new one.  I absolutely love it. 

Since getting the new camera, I purchase an inexpensive, fixed lens.  It is a 50mm lens.  I cannot believe the pictures I've been able to capture with this thing!

Anyway, fast forward to today.  I ordered a Light Scoop and SteadePod from Photojojo.com and they arrived today!  I haven't tested the SteadePod, but I have tested out the Light Scoop.  And boy, oh, boy, is it great!  I hate using my flash.  I avoid it at all costs. 

Here's an example of what I would do in a low light situation.  The following picture is set at f1.8, ISO 1600, shutter speed 1/80.  I only cropped the photo, so no editing.  

 This next picture was taken with the flash.  I believe my ISO was set at 800, f1.8, and shutter speed 1/200.

 

 Now, here's a picture with the Light Scoop. Same settings with just the flash alone.  This time, the Light Scoop took that flash and bounced it up to the ceiling for a more natural look.  I love it!

 

Photojojo also sends over a little stow-away in the package.  A little plastic dinosaur.  They encourage customers to take a picture of their stow-away and submit the photo with a caption.  

My son is on his way to being a paleontologist.  He loves dinosaurs.  He knows many of the obscure ones.  And he knows many facts about them.  So, we had to introduce the new little dinosaur to his gang of dinosaurs.  Here are some of my favorite shots.  

 I can't wait to try it out some more!

My little paleontologists

One really cool investment we've made was an annual membership to the Denver Museum of Nature & Science.  We must have gone at least a dozen times since first joining last year. 

Additionally, Tristan has taken a keen interest in dinosaurs, and other animals (especially the reptilian sort).   I am not just talking about "I love dinosaurs" phase.  This kid has studied dinosaurs and watched numerous documentaries on various dinosaurs.  And he's only six!

He can tell you the three periods of the Mesozoic era.  He knows what therapods are and what traits they typically have.  He can name numerous species of dinosaurs and tell you that a Dimetrodon is not a dinosaur (not commonly known, by the way). 

So, I don't mind calling him my little paleontologists.  In fact, we like to encourage his current passion by purchasing books and looking up videos on the internet. 

During our last visiting to the museum, we visited the gift shop.  It is hard to leave empty handed with two kids.  However, when we spotted these dig/excavate a dinosaur "fossil" kits, we just had to get one.  Well, then Melayna wanted one, too.  So, we purchased a smaller version for her.

We headed home and quickly went to work.  It was messy.  It was dusty.  It was fun....for about fifteen minutes.  Then it was a lot of work.  And it was taking too long.  Of course, Mom and Dad had to step in and help them out.  Before we had to step in, I couldn't help but take a few pics while they were concentrated on their work.

Unfortunately, I didn't get any after pics because everything was so dusty and dirty.  I didn't want that to get into my camera lens.

Snow Day

This winter has been fairly mild compared to the past number of years.  We've had very little snow with little accumulations.  So, when it snowed this past weekend and didn't melt by noon, the kids and I took advantage of our sloped backyard for some sledding fun. 

I also took the time to do some photo editing in PSE 8.  I had fun playing around with various actions.

A toddler no more....

This past weekend we celebrated my youngest child's third birthday.  What a fun and exciting time, but the time has passed so quickly.  It was only yesterday, I brought her home from the hospital.  What happened to make the time go by?  Where did it all go?


Well, I didn't let my recent hospital visit deter me from celebrating my baby girl's birthday.  Our itinerary included a trip to the Denver Zoo (I got a great deal on Living Social), a picnic in the park, a visit to the Science & Nature museum (we are members), and a puppy themed party.  It wasn't a huge party.  Just us, the two kiddos that Scott babysits, grandma, grandpa, and Uncle Robert.  It was plenty for a little three year old, though!  Lots of love and lots of fun!

 Here are a some pictures of my sweet baby girl:

My hand is this big!

Reflections

Daddy's little girl!

Puppy faces for a puppy party!

Puppy cupcakes!  (These are the labs)

Pugs! 

Schnauzers!

The whole gang.  Complete with paw print and dog bone cupcakes!

Melayna blowing out her candles!  All three of them!

Poor pug didn't stand a chance!

A trip down memory lane:  pictures of Melayna a couple days old.  Here's a link to the post on my previous blog: http://miean.blogspot.com/2008/10/shes-so-irresistable.html